The Library Project: A Lesson in Gentility

William MacInnes was sailing to his second term as mayor after winning the June primary. He would be unopposed in November. The only political issue was real estate taxes. Council was sensitive to increased public spending.

First-term councilwoman Mary Ellen Ballou approached him with a proposal. She wanted to renovate the 1895 railway station, which the town acquired in 1988. But she carried a secret. Mrs. Ballou was the epitome of the smart, but always gentile women of Sea Girt.

Restored library from the other side of the tracks

She had lived in town for 30 years with her husband, Dr. Robert Anthony Ballou, an eye surgeon who passed away in 1985. She was just 56 when she was widowed. She stayed very active. Mary Ellen was president of the NJ Trinity College (Washington DC) alumnae association, and VP of the National Association. She was a public school librarian in Point Pleasant Beach after a career as a copywriter and researcher for BBDO Advertising Agency.

Starting in 1991, she put on a Summer Soire at the home of fellow Sea Girter, Carol Neves, a Merrill Lynch executive and Trinity alum. The parties were organized by a number of women, including her daughter, Anne Ballou Morris, also a Trinity College graduate and a future Sea Girt Councilwoman. Anne was one of four Ballou children.

Mary Ellen became the President of the Sea Girt Real Estate Owners’ Association before being elected to her first of three terms on Borough Council. She was known for her firm but gentile demeanor, which was the norm at the time.

The station turned library and the plaza around it.

This character was on full display at a meeting of the School Board. Joan Calhoun, long-time school board president, led a very civil meeting that discussed the re-assignment of SGES’s 24-year veteran kindergarten teacher, Jane Richards.

Several parents of incoming students insisted on a change, but there were no ill words spoken about Jane Richards or the administration. Asbury Park Press reporter Steve Giegerich tried to dig the dirt, but the residents, teachers, and board members courteously declined to air dirty laundry about the situation. The most he could get were murmurs about the decision being political. Some suggested the teacher was too strong with discipline. But the reporter still had trouble getting enough for his story, as everyone was so polite. “First and foremost”, they stated, “All we want is the betterment of our children.”

Someone reminded him, “Gentility is the Sea Girt way.”

Mary Ellen Ballou warned about the chilling effect of second-guessing the judgment of the teachers, cautioning the School Board calmly that it should avoid “…depreciating the professional value of teachers. Nobody tells a doctor how to use a scalpel; why should they be able to tell a teacher how to teach?”

In 1990, she formed a Library Trust Fund, and it was seeded with over $100,000. George Mckelvey’s investment firm made a donation, and an “anonymous couple who used to live in town” seeded most of the rest. Mary Ellen insisted on keeping the gift quiet.

Mary Ellen is recognized on the plaque at the library door

MacInnes told people in town that the existing library tax, which permitted participation in the Monmouth County Library, would help supply any needed books, and the Trust would provide the necessary upgrades to the train station.

They found Ann Ryan, who had run the Bernards library before moving to Bay Head, and she took the small supply of books out of storage. The library, run mostly out of the lighthouse since the 1950s and in a small part of the station in summer, had been shuttered since the budget referendum failed in 1988.

Work took longer than expected. Termites had eaten up the wooden supports and about four inches of siding. A complete raised foundation had to be dug under the building, as there was no solid wood to lift the old station. The rest of the station preserved its 1890s rail station charm. The new permanent Sea Girt Library and Station Plaza opened in May 1992 to champagne toasts.

Mrs. Ballou noted, “This is all due to the generosity of one anonymous donor, along with many supportive residents.” She diverted press questions about the donor.

After two long years of work as chair of the Library Committee, she noted, “I’m very proud of it. After all, what’s a town without a library?” She said there was more work to be done, but she was excited to show off the state-of-the-art computer system and the wonderful children’s section. “It lends an air of civilization to the town, don’t you think?”

The baggage building was too far gone; it was to be replaced with a gazebo. As promised, the town did not use public capital investment and passed ordinances to take money from the trust. Small fundraisers at the library generated several thousand dollars each, but the trust’s disbursements reflected a much larger source of capital.

It was not until 1999, when she was 94, that former elementary school teacher Sara Kurr Zock permitted Mary Ellen Ballou and Ann Ryan to disclose to the town her philanthropy. She did not disclose the amount, but the Zocks gave over $150,000.

Joe and Sara Zock had two of the longest-held seats on the New York Stock Exchange. They bought a summer house in 1965 and retired to their Sea Girt Crescent Parkway home in 1969. They were appalled when the 1988 budget resolution caused the library to close, and they resolved to use their fortune to rebuild a library in town. Sara noted that they stayed anonymous for so long because they lived in town and did not want the attention or judgment, good or bad, from their neighbors. Once permitted, Mary Ellen Ballou pushed Sara front and center into the spotlight. While reluctant, Sara celebrated her 95th birthday at the library. She was proud of her contribution to Sea Girt in a modest, gentle, and most appreciative manner. After all, “Gentility is the Sea Girt way”.